Maniacal Musings: The Day Ahead

I slept for like an hour between 12-1am. It is a bit unusual that I have been sleeping less than 2 hours a  night. I am hanging in there and don’t feel any adverse residual effects at this time.

When I wake up in the maniac’s hours ready to work I see in front of me this big day filled with lots of endless possibilities and potential. I never wake up grouchy or out of sorts, and I go from completely being asleep to completely being awake. There is no transition.

My mindset is always a hurried a basket of rapidly paced thoughts to work out as fast as possible.  I first go to the store with Julia Bleu and get my coffee and race home to take my Adderall to complete the golden elixir.

Lately I have been reading the Holy Bible and writing in my journal during the maniac’s hours. I didn’t do that today, in fact I didn’t do much besides goof off on Facebook after 8 am as I had internet problems. I spent the maniac’s hours writing in my Word documents and trying to configure a website that would be more helpful to my anorexic readers.

A friend of mine on Facebook gave me the blog site of her brother, who has compiled an amazing blog on everything Bipolar. I can not wait to read his blog in its entirety as he has many personal posts, and a wise array of helpful links. I can’t help but think and wish I had Bipolar. There is medication, a community, and lots of support. I wish I knew just one other person with pure mania to talk with and share experiences. I have tried talking to normal people or people without pure mania and it is always a disaster, and always falls way short of what I am looking for.

Yesterday I started a new blog for my Pure Mania called DSYORDER, and I will keep my crazy and Madness to this blog for the most part as I think as I delve deeper into my brain and attached mind I am not sure I am connecting with readers who have no idea what the hell I am writing about.

I wrote a lot this morning and saved it, and printed it so I could rework the words and configuration on a hard copy. I called the internet provider at 8 am and had my router hard set and I was back on the internet. I called my friend in Australia on the Facebook phone and began to think about my first blog of today.

I wanted to write about my mindset of what it is like when I wake up for the day. If I start where I left off, I would say that after the golden elixir I am rearing to go and chomping at the bit to do something productive for those early morning hours. I am engaged and happy whether I am reading and journaling or writing a blog.

I feel like my blog writing has taken a turn away from the anorexia story and I want to get back on that story today as a number one priority. I still have quite a ways to go in the story and I know I have been slow with the writing.

I usually start getting antsy around 5 am or so, and the last hour until six am is usually hard on me. I always push through and a lot of time pick up a second wind that jets me well past 8 am.

Today, my day is not usual or customary and I am struggling to stay focused and in the moment with my writing and get this blog of my mindset out to publish in a timely manner.

After around 8am, I usually take a break from writing and the computer and try to get as much done around the house as I can in a little less than an hour.

Julia Bleu gets fed and taken care of, and I usually try to make any familial phone calls during this time.

The only way to describe the waking up in the maniac’s hours is crazy, enthusiastic and motivated.

My productivity is usually quite high and my spirits are just as high and I needn’t the time or have the desire for talking to anyone else besides my beloved Julia Bleu.

I am super psyched for the day today, have way too much to do, and accomplish, so prioritizing will be essential to a fruitful day. I am as always optimistic and I feel like for the most part I am walking on clouds.

This is all part of the Pure Mania, put I see there is a way to write without words that spook anyone or turn anyone away. I am happy to share my mind and what I think, and I am grateful this morning to share with you the morning perspective I own from when I awaken.

-Corey

BORN THIS WAY-2016

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