We had to backtrack and go pick up my mother from sewing and then go to the away game where we didn’t know where the school was.
Bella’s games were good, her team won in two straight games and she is improving all the time.
I got a ride home with a family friend and met Stephanie back at the house. I was happy to see her and had noticed a big shift in my Chi (energy).
I was entering into the zone I have which is the ultimate space for my mind to work and think. The gremlins and demons had quelled just enough for the zone environment to appear.
Stephanie immediately noticed the difference in me and I told her I wasn’t hungry I needed to write. I didn’t even want to blog, these were big, deep thoughts that I wanted to journal about. I joumaled until 11 pm last night and Stephanie was so happy to see me in this zone.
It is still part of Mania Madness but the very best part of it and I never know how long it will last. I tired myself out last night with all my thinking and writing.
We went to bed about 11:30 pm and I slept until 1:45 am. It was beautiful! I woke up much to my surprise still in the zone and decided to work on my anorexia story for the better part of the maniac’s hours.
At like 6 am Stephanie awoke to find me furiously writing in my journal. She suggested I start my blog for this morning.
So here I am in the zone trying to capture the essence of the zone cerebrally. It is a space where thoughts are just a tich slower than Mania Madness and I can capture them on paper and I am highly creative during this zone period.
I liken it to the perfect storm without the negative connotations. I am able to articulate the expansive spaciousness of my mind’s eyes and capture almost like a an image of prose, if you can imagine the ability to do so and write through it onto the paper or type it into the computer.
I feel like I can draw right now with words. My descriptions are vivid and come to life: I am a skinny, somewhat fragile being with lanky limbs. My white, tousled hair, cropped short around my face that age defies, frames my deep blue talkative eyes, and plumped, always smirking pouty red lips. I walk with a cockiness and a confidence not seen in many, and my demeanor is standoffish but friendly and compassionate up close. The clothes I wear of kids sizes, match my mercurial, and playful persona and I will catch you off guard with my genius that is distorted by my immaturity in other ways.
Those sorts of passages are what I spent my morning writing which isn’t my MO by any means. Those lines flowed freely as I imagined myself through words and drew myself quite well through my prose.
I am going to see where the zone takes me today. I am home alone today as Stephanie heads into the office for the final day of the week.
Today is supposed to be the WordPress photography challenge, although after not happening last week I am not so confident.
Julia Bleu, my steady stead is behind my computer chair and snorting and snoring as I peck at the keyboard.
I have only one hand and can use the other one a little bite but it tires quickly and I am left with just my left hand and lightening fast fingers to hunt and peck the keys.
I am going to write a blog for SCATTERED as well this morning-on what I haven’t a clue but something good will pop into my mind. I am scanning ideas as I write here and now.
I love this time in the zone and wish I lived closer to it without the Madness all of the time. However it does make me somewhat antisocial so probably a good thing it only visits for a short amount of time.
I am ready for SCATTERED and my topics are narrowed.
I pray the zone inhabits my mind for the day although I doubt it will go that long. I will take what I can get, and I pray the demons and gremlins do not pick up energy or that this is the calm before the storm.
I like me right now-although I didn’t give Stephanie the time or energy she deserved. I will make it up to her tonight.
BORN THIS WAY-2016