I awoke to the fiery electricity in my brain over the top and I could not discern from the demons brought out into the daylight by the Devil. His plan was in transferring the bright sunshine splashing above my face as the darkness entered my soul’s pocket of tranquility through my eyes of seas of bright blue eyes. This was until my angels, of the Warrior sort, came down from the heavens and swooped the Devil and his devious plans from my Mad Mania mind and made it possible for me to walk and carry on with the lightness of being once again.
I am in need of my golden elixir that awaits me at the store to be paired with my Adderall to conjure up the first and most potent golden elixir of the day.
I long for its feeling of warmth and comfort as I await the transformation in my neural mesh of cerebrum that envelops both my hemispheres of my brain, and keeps the rapid fire communication that not even I can keep up with. The chattering away with aim and purpose I do not quite understand nor comprehend at the pace oddity in my mind. I am unable to keep pace of the hare pacing all and every electrical connection of my brain all housed in under the cerebrum of my two brain hemispheres.
I put these thoughts and knowledge to the back of my cerebellum and as the main junction in my brain, I await news from the cerebellum that the cerebrum has quieted its pace and I may return home for a time, how long never sure, as it will start up again and I will be without a clue as to the messages my brain intends for me to comprehend. It is frustrations as I learn to keep up with this new pace, only to be met with a greater pace the next time. Is this a game I ultimately can not win?
It feels like that, but I am sure God would never plan such an evil trick on me. I ponder the Devil in his entirety and wonder could Evil be behind the pace oddity and the games I feel are being played at my expense?
I can’t fathom the Devil and his dealings but for a short time. He or it does not exist as a permanent fixture in my soul or brain, and that Love Trumps Hate always, even today in American politics. I laugh a nervous laugh, not my belly laugh of uncontrolled happiness- this is much different. I don’t know what to make of my darkness that sneaks into my brain and tries as it may to reach my soul, coupled with the political landscape of America and the fires of brilliant Evil burning on both sides of the aisle.
I have gone to get my coffee and swallowed my golden elixir with eager anticipation for the outcome awaiting me and my body. I am pondering the stories and journals of Merton and will probably be digging out of the books so that I can reread once again as part of my spiritual journey I am writing about in Finding the Secret in the Ordinary.
I am finally at a place where the golden elixir is brilliantly working its magic against the Evil I fear and live amongst. I am in desperate need to rid myself of the demons that this very morning took over and it gave me the time and the space to recognize the darkness as it enveloped my light. I kept a watchful eye in my own eyes of dark sea blue that I have managed to keep away from the Devil with my belief in God, the angels, and all that is Divine.
I am going to take a trip once the darkness dissipates completely and venture to the grocery store where I will through finding the sacred in the ordinary be able to shop for delicious foods for my pantry and refrigerator and come home to a cozy house with my eyes all a glow from the light bestowed upon me and the darkness that has rescinded from my Universe thanks to the Warrior angels and begin to write my next blog on the Journey of my Spirituality and the Grace upon which I fell, with the blinding white light of God’s daylight light that was proven to be far more powerful than any darkness that the Devil pushed upon me and in my general direction.
I have put off the pain pills as long as possible and need to take them as prescribed whatever the outcome on my brain might be. I have hopes that I will be able to read Merton the great theologian/layperson that he was with such a gift for writing and chronicling his life and the legacy of his thoughts as they traversed the course of time much like his human body did. From a man who bedded many women to the evolution of becoming a monastic Monk and living the life of the monk for the greater part of the later portion of his life.
I have read and reread his works and journals and every time I get closer to the monastic itself and relish the singular life I live and breath. I am very dimensional when it comes to the monastic life and it interests me and awakens my soul to a new dimension every time I read him. Where will I be left today after reading him? I am not sure, vacant of suppositions and yet filled with anticipation.
BORN THIS WAY-2016